Goofy Spam – You Might as Well Enjoy it Too!

It’s time for humor, and finding the humor in things can be a trait of the self reliant. After all, it’s one way of keeping yourself entertained. Today, our humor takes the form of spam. Whether it’s computer generated or people generated, it’s hard to believe that there are individuals out there who think some of their spam attempts will be effective at earning them links back to their sites or enticing someone to click on what they embed.

As you’re probably aware, all comments are moderated here at Self Reliance Works – they always will be. And, we don’t just delete things in our spam catcher, we scan through them to make certain we’re not accidentally catching legitimate comments. Likewise, all comments are read carefully to catch the more stealthy of spam.

Often, some of this stuff is good for a laugh, so as a break in the action, I thought I’d share some of the gems we’ve unearthed in the back room for all to enjoy. I won’t bother to post any of the verbose listings of links to click on, for these aren’t funny, they’re just pathetic. What I’ll share are the ones that really try hard – like a self reliant entrepreneur should – to make it past our spam catcher and personal review. Some of these are a hoot!

Here is a sampling in bold, with my comments added, as if some of these need any commenting. Enjoy!

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I will be trying for an interview with a cryogenic ball valve this Tuesday. Wish me luck.

You’ll need a little luck. I don’t know of a single ball valve that’s hiring these days, and the cryogenic ones can be especially cold and hard on candidates they interview. Don’t get your hopes up.

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Although I enjoyed writing Film Music it was always a means to an end, in that it enabled me to keep a wife and family and write my classical music, which has always been my passion.

This one nearly makes sense, until you realize it’s a comment on my Cracked Heels – Causes and Cures post. I simply don’t remember mentioning anything about film or music in that post. Perhaps I’m missing something essential when it comes to taking care of cracked heels. And, we’re all left in suspense – it’s written with an eye to the past. So, what is this guy doing today to keep his wife and family?

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as if!

I’m quite fond of comments that are concise. I’m okay even with terse ones like this, but please, how about beginning your sentence with a capital letter.

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Dear Sir,

Kindly enroll and send information regarding your respective office.

Thanks.

You don’t have to call me sir, and I don’t need to enroll you. Just click on the RSS feed link, and enter your Email address.

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I’m a 19 year over the hill schoolboy wealthy to Uconn (as a commuter). I secure a share values bright and early function and frame around 400 every two weeks. I give birth to been there for 7 months now and I am in despondent sine qua non of a car. (my responsibility, my house, my drill are hither 25 min away from each other either route) I in need of to rile a car credit but have no established credit. I do have 1000 dollars to set aside down though. Any suggestions or recommendations would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

This is really a sad and confusing story. The part about the drill being 25 minutes away is the troubling part for me. Thanks for sharing…NOT!

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Well, that’s about enough of that Tom Foolery. The Internet, like any other technology, is bound to have its share of those who are focused on abusing it. Apparently people get paid for generating this junk. Gee, I’ll bet that looks good on a resume. Can you imagine the exchange at the interview, “Yes, that’s correct, I was a senior spam technician until I was promoted to special supervisor of all the spam spreaders in my department.” That has to be a more challenging interview than the first guy is going to face with the cryogenic ball valve – to be sure.

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